No, this is why you are wrong. If you’re not attracted to somebody whether it’s their sex, gender or what they have between their legs, you are not obligated to date that person. I know this may come as a shocker to a lot of you, but not everyone is pansexual. Pansexuality is attraction to everyone regardless of sex, gender or genitals. Also, it does not make you transphobic to prefer cis-gendered person. If you are a male/identify as a male and you prefer a cis male or female, you are not transphobic. If you are a female/indentify as female and you prefer a cis male or cis female, you are not transphobic. If you do not fall into the gender binary and you prefer a cis person, you are not transphobic. You are allowed to have preferences based on what you’re attracted to, something that quite frankly you cannot help. People seem to forget that you can’t choose who and what you’re attracted to. Most relationships are made up of more than just romantic attraction. Sexual attraction is also a thing, but it seems like everyone forgets that. Rejecting a person for not being attracted to them is not transphobia. If penis turns you off, you are not obligated to date that person nor do you owe that person anything regardless if they are a man or a woman. Sexual attraction plays a big factor in most relationships, unless you are asexual in which case none of this really applies to you. “Sex isn’t the most important thing in a relationship”. While it may not be the most important to you, it’s still pretty important to those who feel sexual attraction, and to others it might be aka casual dating. “You never cared about that person then”. Right, because not being sexually attracted to someone automatically means you don’t give a shit about them as a person. I will say this again. You are not obligated to sleep with or date someone you are not sexually attracted to. You can not be attracted to someone and still have respect for them.
It is also important to communicate to someone you are getting close to that may end up leading to a relationship about what’s going on down there. Stop with this pretentious “IT DOESN’T FUCKING MATTER”. No, it doesn’t matter as far as friends, family, co-workers, or anything of the like goes, but it is pretty important as far as relationships goes. Part of being in a relationship is communication. Say you’re a woman with a penis, and you’re about to enter a relationship with a lesbian. You need to communicate that with her, and not expect anything out of her if it doesn’t work out in your favor. She is not obligated to have sex with you because spoiler alert: Lesbians aren’t sexually attracted to penises, otherwise they wouldn’t be lesbians. That does not make her a bitch, that does not make her transphobic. It just means she does not want the D [as you hip, young kids are saying these days]. There is a difference between homoromantic pansexual and just homosexual. Homosexual covers both romantic and sexual attraction to the same sex. 9 times out of 10 it’s with the parts that match that sex, whether it be cis gender or post-op trans person. Heterosexual covers both romantic and sexual attraction to the opposite sex. 9 times out of 10 it’s with the parts that match that sex, whether it be cis gender or post-op trans person. Pansexuality covers both romantic and sexual attracting to anybody of any sex or gender. If you have genitals that don’t match your gender or you don’t fall into the gender binary, the reality of it is try establishing relationships with those who are pansexual or asexual.. Going after heterosexuals, bisexuals or homosexuals and then getting mad because they aren’t sexually attracted to you is not their fault. There are plenty of fish in the sea. Some people won’t care, others will and that’s perfectly okay for them to have preferences, as long as they aren’t degrading you in the process.
What is transphobic is shaming, hurting, harassing, bullying, treating them as they are less, assaulting, turning them away from jobs, and any other INJUSTICE act towards them simply because they are trans, non-binaries or their parts don’t match their identity. Not wanting to date someone isn’t transphobia. Why should anyone be obligated to date someone they aren’t sexually attracted to/not interested in? Does that logic only work when we are speaking about women who shouldn’t be allowed to date a person because she doesn’t want to? I put a lot of emphasis on SEXUALLY attracted when speaking about this by the way because when it comes down to it, that’s the only logical reason to turn down someone because of what’s between their legs. Remember, we can’t CHOOSE/HELP what we are attracted to. By that logic, heterosexuals are homophobic for not dating gays and lesbians, and gays and lesbians are “heterophobic” for not dating straight people.